This is how the story in the good gray New York Times began:

"By Damon Hack

"MEDINAH, Ill., Aug. 20 -- As a soft gale pushed at the oak trees along Medinah Country Club's final fairway, Tiger Woods looked at the branches above his head, studying the details of an imminent victory until its final moment.

"After a silent observation, he pulled up a patch of grass, tossed it in the air, and let the wind carry the broken blades over his right shoulder. He tugged at the fabric of his shirt, turned toward the green, then back to his ball, and sent a low and fading dart toward the putting surface."

What imagery! What poetry! What prose! What bilge.

Leonard Shapiro of The Washington Post also was at the last hole of the PGA. He filed from a lower level of Olympus:

"MEDINAH, Ill., Aug. 20 -- Ruthless as always with the 54-hole lead in a major event, Tiger Woods buried a 15-footer for a birdie at the first hole, made three more birdies in the next seven, and eliminated any suspense even before he began the back nine in the 88th PGA Championship.

"It was a no contest runaway at Medinah No. 3 on a sparkling Sunday afternoon, with the greatest golfer of his era and arguably of all time securing his 12th major title and 51st victory of his career."

Once upon a time, or so the story goes, a woman sought advice from a florist as she was about to enter a flower show. How could she hope for first prize? He gave her three sealed envelopes, to be opened seriatim after she had made her arrangement. The first message read, "Take out half your flowers, and rearrange the rest." She did as told. Then she opened the second envelope. Its message read, as you will have guessed, "Take out half your flowers, and rearrange the rest." The third message was the same. Once more she did as told. Naturally, because it's my story and it's the point, she won first prize.

Less is more! Robert Browning said it first. The architect Mies van der Rohe made the aphorism famous. The trick to effective descriptive writing -- one of the tricks -- is to limit your palette. If you would paint with words, paint with few words.

And paint with the right words! The Times' man gave us a "soft" gale. It sounds oxymoronic. Under the Beaufort scale, even the feeblest "gale" checks in at 32 miles an hour. On this Sunday afternoon at Medinah, the soft "gale" was "pushing" at the oak trees. Why was a gale doing a thing like that? Mad at the tree? Bad manners?

Woods made a "silent observation." He did not make a noisy observation. He pulled up a patch of grass -- a patch that had not offended him in any way -- and then he tossed the broken blades over his right shoulder. That was interesting. His right shoulder. It also was riveting to learn that Woods "tugged at the fabric of his shirt." Constant Reader asks, How could he tug at his shirt unless he tugged at the fabric of his shirt? Amazing. And finally, Tiger "sent a low and fading dart to the putting surface." At The New York Times, that is what they call a "green." They call it a "putting surface."

The Washington Post's man at Medinah, Mr. Shapiro, couldn't resist a "ruthless," and he wimped a fearless observation that Woods is "arguably" the greatest golfer of all time, but whose story would you file under the heading of "goo"?

(Readers are invited to send dated citations of usage to Mr. Kilpatrick in care of this newspaper. His e-mail address is kilpatjj@aol.com.)

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