One perk of being a celebrity is that you always have a soapbox to stand on and media on hand to capture whatever opinions you want to share, regardless of how silly those opinions may be. Not that I know from personal experience, of course, but we can always expect curious outbursts from the likes of Michael Moore, Danny Glover, or, more recently, Rosie O’Donnell and Sir Elton John.

First up, Rosie. She isn’t a Constitutional scholar, but plays one on TV, where her new op-ed vehicle is a regular spot on the testosterone-sapping show, “The View.” In an October episode of that cackling hen-fest, Ms. O’Donnell declared that the Second Amendment “isn’t really a right.” The token conservative on the show put up a half-hearted debate, but a commercial break, perhaps thankfully, put an end to the discussion. (No doubt they moved on to more important topics, such as how Orlando Bloom is a “hottie.”)

I’m not sure where one gets the idea that the Second Amendment, as opposed to the rest of the Bill of Rights, isn’t a right. Rosie must be of the opinion that the National Guard fulfills the “well-regulated militia” clause of the Second Amendment when it comes to the people bearing arms.

Yes, Rosie, the Founding Fathers clearly wanted all firearms in possession of the state. There is no way they could have foreseen a situation like that in Darfur, where state-sponsored militias (not so “well-regulated”) have wreaked genocidal havoc on their own countrymen. Ditto Rwanda. And Kosovo.

They never saw that brand of tyranny coming!

Or perhaps Rosie thinks that a call to 9-1-1 is an adequate line of self-defense (after her own armed bodyguards, of course)? If so, she should ask the citizens of New Orleans how 9-1-1 response times fared in the wake of Hurricane Katrina. “Prompt” and “courteous” would probably not be the first adjectives used.

Now to Sir Elton, who chimed in on religion this week: “From my point of view I would ban religion completely,” he said, “organized religion doesn't seem to work. It turns people into really hateful lemmings and it's not really compassionate."

Coming from a guy who was known for performing in a blinking suit festooned with peacock feathers and a live ocelot on his head, Sir Elton’s attempt at a serious geopolitical opinion has to be taken with a grain of salt. That’s not to say that he isn’t entitled to have such an opinion; of course he is, just like Rosie. He just sounds incredibly intolerant and closed-minded for someone who must fancy himself the exact opposite.

Organized religion, Christianity in particular, is responsible for some of the greatest acts of altruism, self-sacrifice, and charity this world has ever known. Indeed, many soup kitchens, homeless shelters, and outreach programs for everyone from the elderly to AIDS patients (a topic dear to Sir Elton’s heart) would collapse if not for the time and money given by the faithful.

Hateful lemmings? Not really compassionate? Tell that to the church youth group that spends its spring break working with Habitat For Humanity. Sir Elton should consider how some people chose to spend their free time when he is “compassionately” dropping $25,000 for a private beach cabana in St. Tropez, or sending back the Beluga caviar for tasting “too subtle.”

Mother Theresa spent a lifetime working with the sick and lame in appalling conditions. The closest Sir Elton has come to seeing what she lived through was matinee of “Oh! Calcutta!” Perhaps he thinks that it was a Walkman cranking out “Crocodile Rock” that sustained her through the difficult times?

Indeed, the erstwhile Honky Cat seems to think that music can heal the world where politics has failed: "The world is near escalating to World War Three and where are the leaders of each religion?” He added, “It’s like the peace movement in the Sixties…if John Lennon were alive today he'd be leading it with a vengeance.”

Please. As if another “bed-in” from the Amsterdam Hilton will lead to some peaceful epiphany for Hezbollah. (Where’s Yoko when we need her?)

Both O’Donnell and Sir Elton are entitled to share their opinions - no less so than yours truly. However, it’s clear that their own inflated sense of self-worth has distorted the view of the world that they chose to share. Sir Elton is gay, so all religion – curiously, not just the hard right - is his target. Rosie lives in gated splendor, so she is blind to the self-defense needs of Joe Sixpack. In both cases, they are shielded from the realities of everyday life.

So, while the red carpet crowd is free to spout their views, they should not be surprised when some of us feel the need to respond in kind:

”Shut the (bleep) up.”